So ist das Leben

Thursday- I gave a presentation to my English class about Fort collins, the US, my friends, what i do, ect... It was alot of fun to talk about home and show them some pictures. Soccer practice was good. nothing to exciting today.

Friday- Friday was ok. for some reason i was feeling really homesick and once again questioning, Why am i here? But friday night i went into the city with a friend from school, got some ice cream and hot chocolate and walked around for like 2 hours. Speaking German the whole time. YES! then i came home and watched Crash, which was such a good movie but really sad.

I think my main struggle in germany is this: for 18 years i have poured everything into my life in Fort collins. Family, Friends, school, sports, youth group and life in general. Who you are becomes defined but what you do, who you know, how smart you are ect. When this is taken away one is left with the question: who am i? Was i the one who defined my life or did my life define me? You begin to find out who you really are, and at times that is a scary adventure. But sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same. funny how that works.

There is an old Zen story about a Monk being chased by ferocious tiger. the monk is running from tiger, when he comes to the edge of cliff, he looks back and sees the tiger about to attack but at the last second he spots a rope hanging over the end of the cliff, he grabs it and begins to climb down. As the monk is hanging there he looks down and sees a quarry of jagged rocks 500 feet below him, he looks up and sees the tiger waiting at the edge of cliff. just then two mice begin nawing at the rope. So what can he do? The monk looks around and sees a strawberry within arms reach growing on the side of the cliff. He reaches out, picks it, eats it and exclaims
"That was the best strawberry i have ever tasted in my whole life."

Think about that for the rest of your life....